Cassie █████

Neil's birthday had been great. I'd had a lot of fun, even though I'd never thought that being in a club would be my thing. But Beck had been really nice, and Rachel had been helpful when I got a little buzzed from that blue drink.

Okay, I'd gotten a lot buzzed. Maybe even kinda drunk! But Rachel had helped me home, and a few days later, Beck had texted asking if I wanted to hang out. Which was nice! I really liked talking to her.

What I hadn't expected was for Beck to try to kiss me. I sort of freaked out about it. She apologized, a lot, and I apologized, too, but I still wasn't sure what it meant. She'd tried to kiss me. And I'd almost let her.

Losing Miles still felt fresh, even though it wasn't anymore. And anyway, Beck was a girl. I wasn't gay, was I?

That was how I found myself at Jack's. I'd never thought of myself as someone who might like girls. Well, before coming to Darrow, I'd never thought of myself as someone who liked anyone other than Jake! Everything was changing, and I needed to talk to someone about what the heck was going on. Jack seemed the safest right now for getting my head in order. I'd talk to Rachel later.

Nervously, I knocked on the door, hoping he was home today.

March 13, 2017

We waited, and we planned, and we found a good entrance. There were some people in cages waiting to either be infested or for their Yeerk to return from its Kandrona bath. Rachel and Daine were with me, and it felt good, it felt normal — and that was awful, wasn't it? That sneaking into the Yeerk Pool was reassuring, and familiar. But it didn't matter, because it was happening. Rachel was here, and the Yeerks were here, and this was what we were meant to do: fight them off, fight them back. Try to help anyone we could.

The Hork-bajir I'd first seen arrive were slouched in their cages, almost all hope gone from them. I'd seen this before. It still twisted my stomach. And the new people, the ones from Darrow, still railed against the bars, screaming to be let go. The echoes were haunting.

<Okay. If we split up, try to hit them from different angles, we might be able to distract them,> I said. I didn't feel right being the one to give orders. That was Jake's role, and it didn't suit me at all.

I stopped going out much after the vampires took me. It was weird to think that something like that existed, but I guess, if aliens existed, why couldn't vampires?

But it was getting to where I needed groceries, and I couldn't just keep asking Miles to run my errands for me. And it was time for Christmas shopping, too. I'd had my list ready all month and still hadn't gotten anything off it.

So, I took a long shower, dressed in my morphing suit — I needed a new one — and pulled on jeans and a tee shirt, then looped a scarf around my neck to hide the new scar.

I had a couple of scars that hadn't morphed away, and I knew this one wouldn't, either. I hadn't morphed in time to heal the bite. It would be a constant reminder that I'd been stupid, and careless, and almost died.

Once I was sure the scar was hidden, I put my jacket on, grabbed my things, and headed out the door.

I went clothes shopping first. A new morphing outfit was priority. My leotard was torn and the blood wasn't coming out in the wash. So I picked up some bike shorts and a tight fitting racer back tank top.

Then, it was to the grocery store. I felt paranoid. I felt like I was being followed around. Like a vampire was going to jump out at me at any time.

I felt my heartbeat quicken and stopped on my way to the supermarket. I leaned against a building, breathing. Just breathe, Cassie. It was all over. I just needed to stay calm.

The school had been a bust. With vacation over for now, I had to wait it out, but that didn't mean I was just going to sit idle. I had a plan now. Writing my letter to Jake had helped settle me in a way I hadn't expected it to. It made me feel like an Animorph again.

The school library had old city plans in the reference section. I'd checked on a whim, and had been pleasantly surprised to find them. So during lunch, I sat in a corner, poring over pages of architectural sketches, and blueprints I barely understood.

I found one for City Hall that seemed really promising. So, that night, I morphed into a great horned owl and glided on silent wings over the city. The world was lit up brightly with my owl vision. I could see as well as an osprey during a clear midday.

I banked around behind city hall, feeling excitement and anticipation rising. There was a maintenance shed, close to the building, but separate from it. One of the plans I'd read seemed to suggest an old access tunnel underneath, connecting them.

An old access tunnel was perfect for an entrance to a Yeerk pool!

Once at the shed, I landed around the back of it and demorphed. I crouched beside the shed, pressed close against the weathered wood. I waited only a moment, shivering in the cold, before morphing into Courtney, my white rat morph. I shrank down, so much that the shed seemed to lunge away from me. I had to sense it with my whiskers to know where it was.

The walk around the shed and under the door felt like a lifetime! I waddled my fat little rat butt through the bits of snow that remained, then squished and pushed under the door once I smelled it.

Rats don't have great vision, but their sense of smell almost works like a second sight. This morph was familiar enough to me that I didn't have trouble adjusting.

When I'd been human, the shed had seemed awfully small. I couldn't imagine there being many useful maintenance tools inside of it. Now, in rat morph, it seemed impossibly huge! The ceiling was so high, it was like it wasn't even there at all. The walls were football fields away! And the smells!

I don't know how long I was overwhelmed by rat instincts, but I finally took back the reins and shook myself. I demorphed, then carefully looked around. A door. I needed a door to this access tunnel. It would take me too long as a rat to find it, without being able to see very well.

I squinted in the darkness, struggling to see. But I didn't even dare to turn on a light. I didn't dare to let anyone know that something was happening over here. Nope, nothing suspicious!

I felt along the floor, trying to see if there was a trap door, or a bulkhead, hidden in the darkness. I fumbled for what felt like forever before realizing that the leg of the shelving unit was the same leg that I'd come across before. And there were no doors in the flooring, either.

Another bust.

Ugh! Jake always made this look so easy! I paced in a frustrated circle for a few minutes, then forced myself to calm down. It was fine. I could try again another time.

I morphed into my white rat morph again so I could sneak out of the shed and back to where I'd morph into owl to get home. It was late, and I had school tomorrow. I needed to get to bed!

Once I'd demorphed, I took a moment, shivering again.

"What's this?"

I didn't recognize the voice, and my first instinct was to hide further behind the shed. But it was too late. There were four guys, all pale and drawn. They didn't look like they were bothered by the cold like I was.

"She's not wearing much," another said. "Maybe we should take her home, warm her up."

I frowned, then laughed. "No, I'm fine," I said. "I just need a minute."

They laughed and said something. I didn't hear it. They rushed me too fast for the words to sink in. Their hands grabbed me, tight and bruising on my arms and sides.

"Ah! Let me go!" I struggled, but they were strong! I opened my mouth to scream, but before the sound could get out, something hit me.

Everything went dark.

I didn't like to morph where there was the chance people could see me. I usually stuck to morphing inside my apartment, with the window open enough for me to fly or climb out, or else take the bus somewhere to the edges of town and morph behind some construction, or in a warehouse alley, or somewhere else similar. I didn't want anyone to see me morphing, if I could help it.

Mind you, that didn't mean that I always succeeded. Sometimes, people were unavoidable. That was how I'd met John, actually. He was one of the only people that knew I could morph, and he'd been so gallant, making sure I kept my secret so that no one would try to hurt me. It was sweet, and I'd felt weirdly safe when he'd found out, not afraid.

But I wasn't going to run around blurting my secret out to everyone, either! I'd gotten used to keeping this secret, until it felt like telling it was actually going to physically hurt me and I wanted to tell Jack, tell Miles, but I wasn't sure I could. What if I'd been wrong this whole time, and one of them was a Controller? Or, if not the whole time, most of the time. I had no idea if the Yeerks had followed me here, how deep their hold on the city was, or how many people they'd infested. I had no idea who I could trust!

So, once and for all, I resolved to find out.

I stripped down to my morphing suit — nothing more than a navy blue leotard with bike shorts over top — and cracked my window open about ten inches. I morphed quickly into my osprey morph so I could fly easily out the window and around the city.

The view was amazing from up here. I could see almost to the city borders just from my apartment building. The sun beating on the asphalt provided thermals that would make Tobias jealous. I zoomed straight up — up and up! — until the people braving the chill were just little ovals beneath me.

From here, I could see all of the buildings that I thought the Yeerks would want to use as entrances to their Yeerk pool: city hall, the schools, department stores and malls. School wasn't open right now, so it would be weird if anyone, Controller or not, used any potential school entrances. On the other hand, it would mean that I could take the time to look for them without being noticed by the bad guys. Then again, the fact that the school was closed for the holidays meant that any Controllers could come and go as they pleased, without having to worry about nosy students.

Argh! This was why I needed Jake. I wasn't good at making decisions like this. Jake was the strategist. Not me.

Okay, just think, I told myself. The schools were a good option. No one would be there to catch me. If there were any Controllers, I was in morph — a decent battle morph, if I needed it to be — so they wouldn't know it was me. I could scope it out, see if anywhere looked promising.

I banked towards Petros High, then hopped thermals the entire way. It made flying easy and fast. Soon, I was perching in one of the larger trees behind the building. My keen osprey eyes saw every crevice that could be a secret entrance, every shadow that might be a hidden door.

Movement inside! Hide!

I fluttered up behind a branch, then directed my gaze at the window. Osprey eyes are meant for finding fish through the surface of the water. Looking through a window was a piece of cake.

A janitor. Phew, nothing to worry about. Wait. What was he doing?

He was standing at the janitor's closet door, but he kept playing with the knob. Twisting a secret code to unlock the Yeerk pool entrance?

No, I realized as I watched. Just figuring out which key to use. The staff had begun locking the closets up so kids couldn't make out in them during class. I guessed this guy was new, or forgetful.

I watched him for another hour before I realized that there was nothing suspicious about the janitor. And, maybe, nothing suspicious about the school. I hoped it was a sign that maybe the Yeerks hadn't come, but I had a feeling it was more of a sign that I hadn't picked the right spot.

Resigned, I flew back to my apartment. I'd try somewhere else another time.

I hadn't seen Miles in awhile, but I hadn't stopped thinking about him. I felt this weird flip in my belly every time I thought of him. It was different than when I was around Jake all the time. I didn't want to say better, but maybe that wasn't the wrong word, either. Being around Jake had felt right, but fighting the Yeerks had changed how we were together.

Miles and I weren't like that.

I mean, I guess we weren't really like anything, since we barely knew each other. Or, I barely knew him. This city was so confusing!

But either way, I wanted to be able to see him again. I missed him. Maybe that was weird, but it was still true. Without the Yeerks to focus on, and no real friends in this place, no one that I felt like I could see all the time, my brain had decided to fixate on Miles.

Okay, even I had to admit that was weird. I hope I didn't seem creepy! I pulled out my phone and sent him a text before I could think too much about it.

Hi! Want to hang out? I miss Snowflake.

It sounded lame after I re-read it, but it was too late. I'd sent the message, and I would just have to deal with it if he thought I was dumb.

My name is Cassie.

I can't tell you my last name, or where I'm from. But I can tell you where I am now: Darrow.

It's possibly the weirdest city to ever exist. It's like some bizarre intersection of science and magic. It sucks you in, taking you from your home and sort of planting you here. It pits you against all sorts of weird things. Almost anything can happen inside its borders. By rights it shouldn't even exist.

But it does.

And it was about to get a whole lot weirder.

See, where I'm from, there was this invading force, called the Yeerks. Nobody here knew about them. I was from a whole different parallel universe to everyone here — even the people that were from the United States! I was also from about ten years behind Darrow. (That had been weird to get used to.) But the Yeerks, they were sneaking into my home, infesting humans and turning them into Controllers. Nobody was safe. Anyone could have been a Controller. It was awful.

And it was just me and my friends fighting them. We fought against all sorts of monstrous schemes and creatures. The scariest for me — next to Visser Three, the leader of the Yeerk invasion, that is — were the Hork-Bajir. Picture a green, seven-foot-tall kangaroo, but with talons instead of those big, hopping feet. Now picture a beak instead of a nose, and a snake-like neck and head. Kind of freaky, right?

Now picture blades coming out of its head, arms, legs, and tail.

That's a Hork-Bajir. And the Yeerks use them as vicious shock troops. Those blades are their main weapons, and they use them with deadly force.

And as I turned a corner on this particular day, bag of groceries in my hand to fill my Darrow fridge, I realized that I was seeing not one, not two, but three Hork-Bajir-Controllers standing on the street. Right in front of me!

They were looking around, heads twisting and bobbing, in as much confusion as I remembered feeling the first time I woke up here. They had no weapons — no Dracon beams, that is — but they were still dangerous. It looked like they were alone. I hoped they were. See, I knew that, since the Yeerks had come to Earth, Hork-Bajir were used for the grunts. Only important Yeerks were given human hosts. So I knew that these three in front of me were probably just foot soldiers, with no commander, and probably no orders.

That didn't make them any less terrifying. In fact, it made them more terrifying. Because an evil, cruel creature like a Yeerk, without a commander to tell them what or what not to do, was a very dangerous thing.

I was totally frozen in place, staring at the Controllers. I had no idea what to do! No, that wasn't true. I knew exactly what to do. I just didn't know if I could do it, by myself. Jake wasn't here to take over. Rachel wasn't here to make me feel brave. Marco wasn't here with his lame jokes to help us laugh. Tobias wasn't here flying point. I was alone.

With three Hork-Bajir-Controllers, looking more and more agitated by the minute.

And when the first scream rang out at the sight of their vicious selves, they hissed.

And that was when things got bad.

[ The Yeerks come to Darrow! Well, a few of them, anyway. Find Cassie (and three Hork-Bajir) on the corner of Harbor Boulevard and Mulholland Drive. The Hork-Bajir are not armed, but they are armed if you get my meaning. Expect them to cause all manner of trouble, but no deaths, please! More info here. If your pup is a friend of Cassie's, they can expect a vague text from her warning them away from this area. Open to all, forever and always! ]

I didn't do it because I wanted anything in return. I did it because the idea came to me, and I wanted to do something kind for him. Which was how I found myself spending Christmas Eve in a bookstore, and then in another store getting some wrapping paper, a basket, and one of those sausage and cheese Christmas snack packages.

I hoped he liked it. I'd tried to be thoughtful, and get things I thought he'd like. So, in the basket were copies of Shakespeare stories, all in hardcover, with what I thought were pretty sleeves. I got copies of Romeo & Juliet, Hamlet, Macbeth, and A Midsummer Night's Dream. I thought it would be a nice change; the woman at the bookstore said it was a comedy, and even though he'd told me he didn't like them, I thought it would do him good to read them.

I also had a scarf tucked in and around the books and the snack package. It was dark red and dark gray, long and wool and warm. I wasn't sure he even felt the cold, but if he did, and he didn't say anything? I just didn't want him to get sick. I didn't think he would let me take him to the doctors if he did.

On Christmas day, I bundled up against the weather and made my way over to his building.

After I left his apartment, I'd tried to get back to this new life here. It wasn't easy. Nothing about this place was easy, because everything was so . . . easy! I didn't know what to do. I had no Yeerks to fight. No amount of searching at the library had turned anything up about The Sharing, or Controllers, or Yeerks, or aliens. I wasn't sure if this was a good thing or not. I didn't have any chores. I didn't have the Wildlife Rehabilitation Center. I didn't have anything except school.

The next few nights had been hard. I was alone in my apartment, and the nightmares came freely. There was no one to wake up but myself, and I did that a lot, usually crying out or just plain crying. I just kept seeing the termite queen's head. I kept feeling her neck in my pincers. Sometimes, the nightmare would shift, and I would be the termite queen, and Visser Three would be killing me.

Some nights, I woke up to the TSEWW TSEWW of Dracon beams. Sometimes to the echo of Visser Three's terrible thought-speak laughter. The dreams were different, night to night. But each morning was the same: I woke up, exhausted and shivering, tears crusting my eyelids and my brain feeling foggy.

Maybe that was how I ended up here. I didn't want to be alone. I didn't want to fall asleep. And he made me feel safe.

So, after school, I went to the grocery store and I bought food. Veggies, fruits, bread, eggs, steak and chicken. I got some seasonings I recognized from my mom's spice rack. I got some things I remembered my grandmother telling me about. I got tea, too. I didn't know if he liked tea, but I got it anyway.

And then I found myself at the big building he lived in.

Frankenstein's Creature. That was his name. Or, at least, that was what the city was calling him. I didn't even think that story was real, but. Here he was. Live and in color, just like me. The city knew. Just like it knew what to call me, even though I'd never told anyone my last name since coming here. I hadn't told anyone my last name since meeting Prince Elfangor. But this place knew who we were. If it was possible for this place to know anything. Sometimes, I was still convinced the Ellimist was behind this.

Shifting the bags of groceries in my arms, and my school bag on my back, I reached and pressed the buzzer.

"Please be home," I whispered.