[ for Baz ]

[mynameiscassie]

I stopped going out much after the vampires took me. It was weird to think that something like that existed, but I guess, if aliens existed, why couldn't vampires?

But it was getting to where I needed groceries, and I couldn't just keep asking Miles to run my errands for me. And it was time for Christmas shopping, too. I'd had my list ready all month and still hadn't gotten anything off it.

So, I took a long shower, dressed in my morphing suit — I needed a new one — and pulled on jeans and a tee shirt, then looped a scarf around my neck to hide the new scar.

I had a couple of scars that hadn't morphed away, and I knew this one wouldn't, either. I hadn't morphed in time to heal the bite. It would be a constant reminder that I'd been stupid, and careless, and almost died.

Once I was sure the scar was hidden, I put my jacket on, grabbed my things, and headed out the door.

I went clothes shopping first. A new morphing outfit was priority. My leotard was torn and the blood wasn't coming out in the wash. So I picked up some bike shorts and a tight fitting racer back tank top.

Then, it was to the grocery store. I felt paranoid. I felt like I was being followed around. Like a vampire was going to jump out at me at any time.

I felt my heartbeat quicken and stopped on my way to the supermarket. I leaned against a building, breathing. Just breathe, Cassie. It was all over. I just needed to stay calm.

Comments

[sidestepdestiny]

I'm on my way to the grocery store to pick up what I need to make Simon a Christmas morning breakfast, and a dinner for us and a guest or two. Which now includes a lion, and snakes knows how many cuts of steak that thing can eat. I change the amount on the list on my mobile from two to five, save it and glance up. When I do I notice a girl huddled against the wall. I can hear her breathing from here, and Simon must really be rubbing off on me, because I ask, "Are you alright?"

[mynameiscassie]

I sucked in a deep breath and forced myself to straighten. "I'm fine," I said. I didn't sound fine, even to my own ears, and I had a feeling I didn't really look fine, either. But I needed to be fine.

[sidestepdestiny]

"You don't look fine," I say bluntly, squinting at the look on her face. I don't even have to listen for her heartbeat to know it isn't beating calmly. I glance around the area. Nothing looks out of the ordinary, but that doesn't necessarily mean anything. "Is someone bothering you?"

[mynameiscassie]

There were a lot of someones bothering me. The problem was, none of them were actually here. They shouldn't have been able to bother me!

I swallowed and shook my head. My scarf felt too tight. I felt like I was going to choke. I reached up and pulled on it. For a minute, I forgot: I forgot about the scar on my neck, still fresh enough that it stood out sharply against my skin. I just wanted to breathe!

[sidestepdestiny]

I feel something cold go through me when I see the scar on her neck. I know what it is - not from home, I didn't know fuck all about vampires back home except that if one had bitten her she'd be a vampire herself and I don't smell that from her - but from my work with the police department here. I don't work at the warehouse anymore, but I know there are still plenty of rogue vampires out there.

But what can I do about it? I don't know this girl, I can't just start asking her about vampires.

"I'm Baz. If you need me to walk you home or something, I can," I offer, uncertain.

[mynameiscassie]

I took a deep breath and swallowed hard, swallowed the lump in my throat. "I'm okay," I said. "I need, I need to get groceries." I pushed away from the wall and felt myself stumble a little. God, get control of yourself, Cassie! I leaned back against the wall and covered my face with both hands.

"I'm sorry!" I quailed. "I'm so sorry, you don't need this. You don't need a total stranger having a mental breakdown right in front of you."

[sidestepdestiny]

My eyes widen at her outburst, and I try to talk calmly like when Simon's about to go off, "It's alright. The groceries will still be there, there's no hurry. You can take all the time you need."

I'm terrible at comforting people, I think. My only practice has been Simon, but that usually involves touching and pet names, neither of which are appropriate for a stranger.

[mynameiscassie]

He was right. I knew he was right. But I felt like it was giving up, like I was letting them win, if I didn't do this. I flapped my scarf against my neck to try to get some cold air against my skin.

"This is so stupid," I said miserably. "I've been through so much worse."

[sidestepdestiny]

"What happened?" I ask. I don't want to pry, but if it's something that can be dealt with here and now, I might be able to help. I still don't know her name, and she really has no reason to trust me, but I'll offer my assistance either way.

[mynameiscassie]

I shook my head. "I don't think you'd believe me even if I told you," I said. This city did weird things, so maybe he would, but I also didn't think I had the strength to see someone look at me like I was crazy. I forced my hand away from the scar on my neck; I didn't even remember reaching up to rub it.

[sidestepdestiny]

"Is it about vampires?" I ask, venturing a guess. "Because if it's about vampires, I'll believe you."

I could be wrong, the scar could be something else entirely, or her problem could be about something else entirely, but it's worth asking. If she's in trouble with vampires I may be able to help.

[mynameiscassie]

I looked up at him sharply. He said it in such a way that I almost believed him. My hand flew up to my scar again, and I leaned against the wall, heavily.

"Yeah," I said weakly. "I— I was taken. I didn't— I didn't even think vampires were real. I didn't know!" I felt stupid for being upset about it, still. The Yeerks had put us through hell even in the short time we'd been fighting them. But they'd never held me. They'd never hurt me.